The Sunday Evening Post
That they may know that I am with you…This is how you will know there is a living God in your midst. (Joshua 3:7,10)
How often must i forgive my brother, as many as seven times? I say to you not seven times, but seventy-seven times. (Mt 18)
Remember I am with you always until the end of the age. (Mt 28:20)
The Gospel from Matthew was our daily Gospel last week Thursday. It was one of the days that I attended Mass. As I sat listening to the Gospel I experienced peace. This was a moment of encounter with Jesus in recognizing the good work He has been doing in the field of my heart. Forgiveness is difficult. Amen? Amen! It just is. I believe that ultimately it is difficult because it is impossible for us to truly forgive within our own capacity. Forgiveness requires cooperation with Divine. I have shared that I have been weathering a difficult season of late and forgiveness is one of the virtues that the Lord has invited me to more deeply embody. Virtues are like forgiveness because by nature we grow in them by having to be challenged. We learn humility sometimes by being humiliated. We learn mercy by experiencing brokenness. We learn patience by having our patience tested. We learn to forgive by being hurt. Jesus’ call to 77 felt like a very real road to me earlier this summer. There were several weeks that it felt I could not go 48 hours without insult being added to injury and the Lord asking me to forgive. When I struggle to forgive I have found myself in confession and so this past July I was again in confession admitting holding onto anger and resentment and hurt. I told Father that forgiveness was so frustrating because I felt like I had to relearn it with each injury, it was never getting any easier. Father told me that that frustration was the enemy trying to convince me that I wasn’t ‘good’ at forgiveness and wasn’t making progress. He shared that while it felt as though I was relearning forgiveness, Jesus was taking me to new depths of forgiveness and I was having to adapt to the depth. Jesus has been taking me deeper into the grace. Fast forward a few weeks and I found myself on the receiving end of a great hurt and insult. In the midst of my tears and anger I was able in the moment to separate the person, whom I truly respected, admired, and liked, from what they said. I was able to forgive her almost immediately and be honest with her about how her comments had impacted me. New depths indeed! Praise to you Jesus! Back to daily Mass and this Gospel of forgiveness. Listening to the Gospel for the first time I did not feel the slight sting of failure but the assurance of the grace of growth. During his sermon Father gave me a whole new and beautiful perspective: we are each called to the grace of forgiveness so that we can be Christ’s very real presence to another. Our ability to forgive another brings Jesus present and demonstrates, ‘This is how you know a living God is in your midst.’ Forgiveness is a gift to both the giver and the receiver and the more that we practice it, the deeper we can dive and bring God’s kingdom fully present. Think of the difficult situations you face in your life and from a world view. Imagine what change can come about if each of us strive to cooperate with God’s grace and mercy.
