From ingratitude to In gratitude
He said, “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I return there; the Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1:21)
give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)
I was on vacation with my mom in Savannah/Charleston when the words [from ingratitude to In gratitude] inspired and convicted me. I was inspired over a year ago by the Holy Spirit to take my mom on this trip. She has not had a proper vacation in five years. That time has been filled with what I believe to be her gift of service. She has been serving her family through some difficult needs. I am well known for my “art” of vacation planning (read: ability to handle logistics at a micromanagement level). This particular vacation was an advanced course in pivoting. There were “challenges” (read: things did not go the way I planned). With each of these challenges as I was able to pivot and recalculate I found myself returning to prayer to thank God for the pivot, for the wisdom and perseverance to keep moving forward. One day in prayer as I was once again giving “thanks” I saw that my thanksgiving was given in hindsight and almost always after complaining. Up to that point in time, my routine was: difficulty/problem - frustration/anger - prayer - resolution - thanksgiving. In other words, my gratitude flowed after ingratitude. This was a moment of seeing myself much more clearly in St. Paul’s “glass darkly glass.” I realized that while I see myself as a hope filled person who loves God and seeks God in my day to day life, I am pessimistic before I am optimistic. My gratitude is in hindsight not anticipation. I have trust issues. In gratitude (pun intended), God gave me several more opportunities during our vacation to become more grateful in anticipation and trust. When the rental car had a flat tire the night before our departure: Jesus I trust that you’re going to get us to the airport safely, thank you. When our flight was delayed and it looked like we might miss our connection: Jesus whenever you return me home safely, thank you. I am learning in this walk of faith that there is gratitude and then there is doctoral level gratitude. I am called to be grateful for the blessings God has given me. I am also challenged to be grateful for the blessings that I trust will come from the challenges of this life ~ before ~ I have received them. Allow me to revert though once again to the gratitude of hindsight. I am grateful for all of the ways that God did indeed provide during our vacation, most of all I am grateful that I can look back over the week that I got to spend with my mom as a beautiful gift.
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34)
Each day does indeed hold challenges for each of us. Where is God inviting you to be forward thinking in gratitude today?
