Abide in Me

Abide in Me, and I in you. (John 15:4)

I awoke this morning, Good Friday, and reflected on our Lord. Last night at the end of the Holy Thursday service, Jesus, in the Eucharist, is taken away from the tabernacle and placed within the shelter of our chapel. This morning I reflected that Jesus spent this morning ‘in custody.’ I reflected on all of those whom He loved scattered. I reflected on the times in my own life that I have been tempted to scatter. I have spent many a Good Friday indignant at the disciples. As I began my morning routine I reflected on the historical scattering of Jesus’ church. It is so easy to look back upon Jesus’ scattered faithful and scorn. It is easy because we have the benefit of the truth of Easter Sunday. The Lord placed the words on my heart, [It is GOOD Friday because we have the perspective of Easter Sunday.] Cue the plinko chips as things begin to fall into place. Jesus’ church has been fractured and scattered time and again over the millennia. Brothers and Sisters, we are living in a scattered church ourselves. Over the centuries, Jesus has been tried and condemned by His faithful who leave His church. The Church has suffered much evil that has been perpetuated from within, each time more and more decide this is the moment to leave. This is the moment that is irredeemable. I imagine the disciples and followers of Jesus felt the same when they witnessed Jesus arrested, or tried, or whipped, or carrying the cross, hanging on the cross, or finally laid in the tomb. For every Catholic initiated into the faith some 7 leave. Jesus had a handful of faithful at the foot of the cross, countless others left. In my relatively short life within the history of the Church, I have been ashamed, and deeply sorrowed at wounds inflicted by those who make up the church. I have been persecuted by patients, friends, and neighbors for staying. I have thought of leaving, I have. I remain. I abide. Last night I rejoiced with the good work our Lord is doing in our parish, in Mother Church, and in my own heart. This morning I realized that in remaining with our Lord in His church I have the benefit of witnessing the power of the Trinitarian God at work healing and building up His Church. I realized that when we step away from a relationship that relationship becomes frozen in the state that we leave it. So too with the church, when a person leaves they don’t get to see the healing, the good. They don’t get to see that with God all things are indeed possible. That God is powerful enough to redeem. I have abided in the Catholic Church through many ups and downs. I have remained as John, Mary, and Mary of Magdala at the foot of the cross. In the moment of the doubts, in the moments of pain, of one thing I was certain: I know that Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist. I remain where He remains.

“Where else would we go Lord, You alone have the words of eternal life.” (Jn 6:68)

“The Word was made flesh and dwelt among us.” (Jn 1:14)

So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink His blood, you have no life in yourselves. (Jn 6:53)

There are many adjectives that have described my walk with Jesus in the Catholic Church: dutiful, lukewarm, frustrated, even despondant. God has worked through each of those over the years transforming them by transfiguring me. I have become “on fire”, pentecostal, evangelical. Several years ago the Lord called me to a Lenten walk of daily Mass. This began as twice a week, grew then to three times a week, and now has become my daily bread. Jesus has brought me to the fullness what has held me within the church all along; I have become a Eucharistic Catholic. Jesus from the cross cries out, “I Thirst.” He seeks to welcome home the weary, the hurt, the lost, the angry, the lukewarm. Jesus knows the whys of the wounds that drove each person away. He lived those wounds on His cross. Jesus thirst for all who remain away from Him. If this stirs anyone’s heart who reads it, can you have the courage of Peter, James, Matthew…? Can you come home to Him? For those of you who remain as I remain, we have work to do to help our brothers and sisters come home and feel welcomed. We must witness the power of God in the Church as we are told at the end of every Mass, “Let us go forth and announce the Gospel of the Lord, glorifying the Lord by our lives.”

Addendum: I wrote this on Good Friday, as I listened to Fr. Mike Schmitz’s Sunday sermon on Easter, I felt it ties in well. So I include a link below.